Two bells and a jutsu
by Cip
Summary: A day before the Chuunin exams Kakashi puts his team through the bell test again.  This time they have a better strategy and their sensei gets more than he bargined for.  First story I've posted so please be nice  :D


Heh, God knows where this idea came from! I was supposed to be studying for my exams and this happened instead. Oh well, enjoy all the same.

None of the characters are mine, if they were Naruto would be unfit for kids to view ;D

2 Bells and a Jutsu.

Kakashi materialised in frount of his three pupils with his trade-mark smile-and-wave.

"Kakashi-sensei! You're late!" Sakura and Naruto screamed in unison. Sasuke, as always just continued to stare at the floor.

"Yes, sorry about that, I took a wrong turn down memory lane." Their teacher grinned hopefully. All he received was two death glares and a 'tsk'. "Fine, so, you three ready for the exams do you think?"

Naruto leapt about five feet in the air. "You bet! I'm gonna show them what _real_ power is! Then they'll _have _to choose me as the next Hokage!" He landed awkwardly and fell backwards onto his butt.

"I'm sure _that_ will impress us all." Sasuke muttered. He looked up at their teacher. "Are you here to show us a new Jutsu, or just talk?"

"Actually I can only stay a few minutes." Kakashi said airily. "Tomorrow's the day before you have to hand your application in; I want you all to meet me nine AM sharp tomorrow morning at the training ground. I want to see how much you've improved."

"What will we be doing Sensei?" Sakura asked curiously.

Their teacher pulled out two bells from his pocket, each on a small length of string.

"What do you think? Have a nice day." He vanished.

"Great, yet another pointless waste of time." Sasuke muttered. However his grumble went unheard under Naruto's shrieks of:

"Yeah! We'll show him! Teamwork, that's the key, he won't know _what's_ hit him! C'mon guys, lets go train -" His attempt to dash off was hindered by Sakura's grip on his collar.

"Naruto! Teamwork or not, we still can't beat him. You saw how he took down Zabuza." She let go of her team-mate. "We don't have a chance against him, even with Sasuke-kun's Sharingan."

Sasuke glared at her. "Your faith in my abilities is astounding." He said coolly. He ignored Sakura's sweat-drop and the stammered apology. "Never-the-less, you have a point."

The girl stopped blindly gabbling and stared at him. "I…I _have_?"

Sasuke snorted. "Yeah, for once." He pushed away from the wall he was leaning against and began pacing. "If we get serious then he will, and I'm not going head to head with _his_ Sharingan. Mine isn't that advanced."

"So we don't get serious, no problem." Naruto said airily, folding his arms behind his head. Both his team-mates glared at him "What?"

"That's stupid Naruto!" Sakura fumed. "How can we beat him and _not_ be fighting seriously?" She glared at her friend, and even Sasuke looked vaguely interested.

Naruto looked between them, grinning. "Have I worked it out and the geniuses haven't? Hah! Well, I might just not -" He was broken off by Sasuke's fist connecting with his jaw.

"If you have an idea, _tell_ us!"

Naruto rubbed his smarting jaw and growled at the Uchiha.

"I was _going_ to!" He muttered sulkily. He fussed over the bruise for a few more moments until he realised that this behaviour would earn him another punch. "We need to exploit Sensei's weakness."

"Which is..?"

"Women."

The other two stared blankly at him.

"Women." Sakura repeated. "Please expand on that jewel of wisdom."

"The most infamous Jutsu!" Naruto said grandly, spreading his arms wide. "The…Ninja Centrefold!"

Sasuke growled. "I think I might hit you again. This is the _stupidest_ -"

"Wait Sasuke-kun!" Sakura grabbed his wrist. "Hear him out."

Naruto stared blankly at her then grinned. "Yeah, hear me out!"

Sasuke glowered at them both. "Fine then. Explain."

The blonde boy grandly outlined his plan. When finished he grinned at his team-mates.

"well?"

"That's the biggest load of crap I've ever heard!" Sasuke exclaimed. "It's absurd! No ninja of Kakashi's level would _ever_ fall for such a joke of a Jutsu!"

Naruto folded his arms mulishly. "Well, Ebisu-sensei did!"

The other two stared at him for a moment.

"Ebisu? _Really_?" Sakura said in surprise. "He's a pretty high level shinobi."

"Yep, and I got him good!" Naruto proclaimed happily. "So," He glanced in Sasuke's direction, "Unless our Uchiha genius can think of anything, it's the only plan we've got."

The 'Uchiha genius' scowled. "Fine, no, I can't think of anything. But _must _we stoop to your level of immaturity?"

Naruto grinned slyly. "Well sure, unless…you can't do it."

"I can too!"

"That's settled then." The fox-boy said cheerfully.

Sasuke growled and settled down into his usual sulk. Sakura rolled her eyes.

"Okay Naruto, it's settled." She held up a hand to stop his jubilant shout, "But, what am _I _supposed to do? I'm _already_ a girl!"

Naruto scratched his head. "Uh, didn't think about that. Sasuke, any ideas?"

"How about you make yourself vaguely pretty?" Sasuke muttered.

Inner Sakura committed murder. Outer Sakura held back tears.

"O-okay, Sasuke-kun." She quickly wiped her eyes.

Sasuke began to walk off. "Let's go to the training ground if we're going to do this then."

Sakura started to trail after him until Naruto caught her arm.

"Wait, Sakura–chan!"

"What?"

He smiled hopefully. "Ignore Sasuke, I think you're pretty anyway."

"Shut up Naruto."

Three hours passed. There were tantrums, arguments and a few tears before the Jutsu was finally learnt.

"Okay, here goes." Sakura closed her eyes and performed the hand signs. "Ninja centrefold!"

When the smoke cleared her two friends stared.

"Well? Is it okay" She asked anxiously.

"Nnhh..."

Sakura's hair was now waist-length, flowing and silky. She pushed it back over her shoulders to tumble down in pink curls. She now had a lot more curves in places the two boys were trying not to think about.

"Well Sasuke-kun, what do you think?" Even her voice had changed; now it was the sort that served ice-cold drinks on a tropical beach.

"It...You...Yeah, it'll do." Sasuke managed. The vision in front of him vanished and appeared as his normal team-mate. He shook his head and hurriedly wiped away the nosebleed. "What did you think Naruto? Naruto?" He looked down. "Oh, for heaven's sake!"

Naruto was lying unconscious at their feet with a happy smile on his face.

It took a while to wake him up.

Once the fox-boy was conscious again and standing, Sasuke wasn't looking at all happy.

"My turn then." He muttered grumpily. He sighed and quickly performed the hand signs. "Nina centrefold!" Once the smoke cleared his friends leapt back, going pale. "Well Naruto? Any good?"

"Eep." Naruto had backed into a tree.

"You didn't answer me." Sasuke purred, prowling forwards. Long black hair swirled around his female form as he tapped Naruto on the nose. "How do I look?"

Naruto forced his vocal chords into working. "You...You're a blinking _vampire_ Sasuke!" He shrieked.

"Am I? Silly me." The 'woman' gave a small chuckle, showing small white fangs. Her blood red eyes locked onto Naruto's. "What should I do?"

"Turn you stupid Sharingan off!"

"You're no fun." Sasuke did as he was told though, returning to his usual form at the same time. "Fine, no Sharingan. Ninja centrefold!"

The same woman appeared, but looking a lot less like the bride of Dracula and more human. Onyx eyes glared at Naruto.

"Well?!"

The blonde boy nodded happily. "_Much_ better." He quickly wiped away his nosebleed as Sasuke turned back. "Sakura, what did you think?"

"Yeah, fine." Outer Sakura said calmly. Inner Sakura laid down and cried: _'The only time I get to see Sasuke naked and it's when he's a girl!' _ "Sensei's in for a shock tomorrow."

"Sorry I'm late guys; aliens abducted me and performed experiments which I can't explain as you're too young to know what the words mean." Kakashi said cheerfully, strolling into the glade.

"No problem." All three chorused. He looked at them suspiciously. Team seven smiled back innocently. Innocent looked fine on Sakura, but on a kid with a demon in him and an Uchiha with a wish to murder someone it was worrying.

"Uh, yeah. So...training." He held up the two bells and smiled. "You know the deal; no bell no lunch." They nodded. "Good." He pulled out this book and sat down. "When you're ready." He began to read only half listening to what they were saying.

_"Remember, no Sharingan."_

_"I know. And how's this going to work if he's not looking?"_

_"Dunno, uh_...Hey, Kakashi sensei?"

"Yes Naruto?" He looked up.

"Ninja centrefold!"

There were three puffs of smoke. He blinked.

Then stared.

"Gnn..."

The three young women giggled and waved.

"Heh..." The teacher's book fell from his hand as he collapsed back senseless, blood running down his face.

Team seven rematerialised.

"Yeah, we did it!" Naruto leant over and picked up the two fallen bells. He jingled them. "Let's go have lunch."

"That was so humiliating." Sasuke muttered, but he couldn't help his own grin. "But I've got to hand it to you Naruto, it did actually work."

"Yeah, nice one Naruto." Sakura grabbed both their hands. "C'mon lets go back to the village"

Naruto looked back at their unconscious teacher. "We shouldn't leave him like that really..."

"Don't be silly, someone will find him and take him back." Sakura dragged the two boys away from the clearing.

Fortunately she was right and someone did find Kakashi.

Unfortunately for him it was Gai.

Fin

Hah gotta love team seven!

Please review, it'll help Kakashi get over the embarrassment.

Love you all Cip xox


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